Week 20: Queen Cancels
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| HRH QE2: Cancelled all OFFL Engagements |
Dave Clayton, Russell Bielby, Malcolm Meaden-Pratt, Nick Borrett, Rick Beecroft, Toby Larking, Karyn Meaden-Pratt, Minty Colquhoun and Craig McHugh all tear a piece off a needlessly over-sized Manager of the Week certificate. It wasn't presented to them by a conspicuously absent HRH QE2 at a disappointing ceremony at Buckingham Palace. 3 points. Each.
On to the Cup First Round.
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The OFFL Cup
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Round One, Wk 21
Pyeators v Toby's Gang
It's A Snickers v Inter Milandrover
Crystal Phallus v Absolutely Fabregas
Neil's Diamonds v Starpratt Mustgo
Guess Hughton v Radnorshire Tigers
Johnny's Heroes v RS-TBOY
Minty's Minions v Irishpool
Sheep City v Epic Yellowz
Game Of Throw Ins v Dowds Farm Goblins
Shutdown FC v Big Girl's Blouses
Moobchester United v Livercoolio
Moanchester United v Roll all the dice FC
Bourneslippy v The Flying Geese
Moreton Rovers v Ali McMoist
Obi Wan Kenobi Nil v Through to the Next Round
The Trumpeteers v Through to the Next Round
T h e T a b l e
Value Points
Team Manager (GBPm)Wk Tot
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1 Pyeators Dave Clayton 54.2 3 231
2 Neil's Diamonds Neil McConaghy 53.9 0 198
3 Crystal Phallus Guy Salter 54.7 0 190
4 Absolutely Fabregas Sarah Bingham 55.0 0 190
5 Livercoolio Russell Bielby 54.8 3 185
6 Inter Milandrover Smasher 54.0 0 183
7 Epic Yellowz Stanley/Kate Wilson 54.7 0 183
8 Starpratt Mustgo Malcolm Meaden-Pratt 55.0 3 180
9 Dowds Farm Goblins Nick Borrett 54.3 3 178
10 RS-TBOY Rick Beecroft 55.0 3 178
11 Moanchester United Alex Blundell 54.9 0 175
12 Johnny's Heroes Sarah Bielby 54.6 0 170
13 Shutdown FC Sam Reed 54.4 0 169
14 Toby's Gang Toby Larking 55.0 3 166
15 Radnorshire Tigers Alun Edwards 54.7 0 165
16 Bourneslippy Karyn Meaden-Pratt 54.5 3 163
17 Big Girl's Blouses Guy Harewood 54.6 0 161
18 Moobchester United Jon King 54.0 0 160
19 Minty's Minions Minty Colquhoun 54.6 3 160
20 Game Of Throw Ins Craig McHugh 54.9 3 151
21 It's A Snickers Ashley Keeler 54.0 0 149
22 Irishpool Mike Smears 53.7 0 143
23 Guess Hughton Nick Reed 54.3 0 143
24 The Flying Geese Mandy Noble 54.8 0 136
25 Roll all the dice FC Gavin Ward 54.9 0 118
26 Sheep City Martyn Field 53.9 0 117
27 Moreton Rovers Edgar Rayner 55.0 2 78
28 Ali McMoist Ali Larking 46.8 0 55
29 Obi Wan Kenobi Nil Chris Walsh 53.7 0 53
30 The Trumpeteers Donald Trump 43.0 0 -9
Week's Average Points 0
Total Average Points 150
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T r a n s f e r s a n d s t u f f
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Epic Yellowz
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From: Kate Wilson
To: Chairman@LittleSmasher.com
Subject:
Dear [Chair]
Urgent transfer request!
OUT
262 Huth LEI
553 Hardy LEI
IN
314 Reid WH
538 Costa CHE
Hope that works! Merry Christmas!
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Chairman responds:
Hardy Vardy? Of course, consider it done.
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Obi Wan Kenobi Nil
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From: Chris Walsh
To: Chairman@LittleSmasher.com
Subject:
Ah! *Almost* manager of the week after a season of manager-of-the-toilet!
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Chairman responds:
Quite. *Flush*
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Irishpool
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From: Mike Smears
To: Chairman@LittleSmasher.com
Subject:
Esteemed Mr President
I have to inform you - while I am no more discontented than usual with Irishpool’s score this week, my good friend Donald Trump is outraged that The Trumpeteers have a minus tally and are going steadily downhill. He tweets: “I refus to axsept this ressult. I will throw somewan in jale. Anyways, who is this Adam Larking? Sounds like a person of Mexican orijin to me - shud be sent bak to were he came from.”
Sir, I leave the matter in your hands.
Yours conservatively
Brexit from Basett.
Ps while, you are pondering that, may I make the following transfer please:
OUT 536 Vokes
IN 586 Son.
Thank you.
Happy Yuletide.
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Chairman responds:
You must introduce me to this Don Oldtrump. He sounds like a bit of a silly billy.
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